The Other (Harder) Side of the Dignity Lesson

Photo Credit: Jamie Lynn Photography

Before I continue with biblical examples on the theme of Bestowing Dignity, I want to share the other - harder - side of the lesson I learned while in Mexico.

During the same tour on which God whispered the words bestow dignity, He also taught me a more difficult truth.  Carmen, our tour guide, was sharing some stories with us of kids who have left the orphanage only to make really bad choices with their lives*.  For example, there are girls who leave the very safe, dignified environment of the FFHM campus and go straight out to find a man.  The thought process here is that if she has a man's baby, he will then take care of her and she will be set for life.  Never mind the fact this has worked for almost no woman in the entire country.  So, off goes the 18 year old, she finds her man, produces a baby, and then finds herself left to fend for herself and her baby on her own.  Thus continues the cycle of poverty, abuse, and brokenness.

When our tour guide shared this very real example scenario, I felt a bit flabbergasted and even began to internally question the work being done with the orphaned kids living at FFHM.  In my very American thinking, A plus B automatically equals C...every single time, right?  In other words, take a child out of poverty and abuse (A), raise them with the love of Jesus, bestow dignity upon them, and meet all their needs (B), and automatically, they will become a fine, upstanding adult who makes wise and safe choices with their life and will walk the "straight and narrow" for the rest of their life (C).

With this mindset, I could not comprehend the fact that ANY of the kids rescued from abuse, neglect, and slavery to be raised instead at the orphanage -- especially THIS orphanage -- would go out to make such foolish choices!  (The girls are not the only ones, by the way.  There are boys who go out from their orphanage home and make foolish choices, too.)  In my linear, American thinking, I began to wonder if the orphanage staff and house parents were perhaps doing something WRONG in their raising and management of the kids.  I also became critical of the kids themselves.

These kids are given EVERYTHING they need for a safe, happy existence: safe shelter, loving house parents, 3 square meals a day, clean clothes, a high-quality education, and job-skills training.  How could they be anything but thankful?  How could they do anything but live out the remainder of their lives demonstrating this gratitude by becoming responsible, healthy, productive adults who love the Lord and live the "right" way?  Truly, I was shocked!  I had a very high and lofty impression of what should result for the kids who grow up in the orphanage.

God used Carmen's stories to knock that lofty impression right back down to earth!  And, boy-howdy, did it sting!

As the tour moved on to the sewing room, and these critical, unfriendly thoughts were stewing around in my brain, the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly into my heart it was almost audible.  This is what He said, "Crista, do not dare stand in judgement over these girls.  YOU are thinking from the perspective of privilege and plenty.  You have NO IDEA what these girls have been through.  You have NO IDEA what influences have shaped their thinking and beliefs.  You have NO RIGHT to judge them or their choices.  I AM their judge."

Oh wow.  Kick to the gut.

Amazingly my spirit responded, "Okay.  You're right.  I'm sorry."

Also amazingly, for the remainder of my week very few more of these critical thoughts crossed my mind.  Instead, my thoughts were dominated by all the examples for the positive side of the lesson...all that God's people are doing in the Baja to bestow dignity on others in the manner of Christ and His earthly ministry.

But back to the Hard Side of this lesson.

As we left the sewing room and continued with the tour, I began to comprehend a new truth regarding this bestowing of dignity.  It is the responsibility (and joy) of the follower of Christ to do the bestowing, whenever and however we can bestow it.  Whether it be the homeless, the family-less, the disabled, the addicted, the abused, the neglected, the hungry, the cold, the broken, the sick, the imprisoned or anyone else, MY job is to respond to the Lord as He leads me in His work of bestowing dignity on others.

What the recipient does with the dignity is between him or her and God.

My job is to bestow and let go.  When I stand before His throne in Heaven, God will hold me accountable for how well I listened to His voice and obeyed.

The other person will stand before Him and give account for what they did with the dignity bestowed upon them by God through His people working on His behalf.

In other words, what the other person does with the dignity bestowed has nothing to do with me.

This truth applies in pretty much every area of my life, most notably as a mom and as a member and partaker in community.  My responsibility is to know and obey God's commands.

As a mom, I am called to love my children and to raise them in the wisdom and instruction of the Lord.  What if I do that, and they still end up living rebelliously or making really bad choices as adults?  They will stand before God to give account for their choices.  I will stand before Him to give account for mine.

As a Christian member of the community, I am called to love, to share, to give generously and not to hoard for myself.  What if God asks me to give money to the man or woman in need and then they use it to buy drugs?  He or she will stand before God and give account for the blessing they received from His hand through one of His followers.  I will stand before Him to give account for my choice to obey Him in being generous.

As a Christian, I am also called to unashamedly proclaim the Gospel:

In this is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.  (1 John 4:10, MEV)

What if I share this truth, proclaim it from the rooftops with all gentleness, kindness, and patience and STILL a person rejects Jesus?  God will hold me accountable for obedience: did I take every opportunity to make the Good News known?  God will hold them accountable for how they responded to Him.

During my week in Mexico and since I've been home, God has been systematically shattering my linear, American thinking process regarding the matter of following Jesus in loving and serving others.  Here are a few of the sub-lessons I learned:

1.  God's economy does not operate by the same rules as the American economy.  Case in point: the parable of the shepherd who leaves the flock of 99 to find the 1 who went missing.  All the angels in heave rejoiced over the 1 recovered lamb.  (Matthew 18:12-14)

2.  We live in a broken world, so the equation is broken, too.  There are instructions in the Bible for how to raise children.  These instructions are wise and are given for the benefit of both the parents and the child.  However, we live in a broken world, so I can, as a mom, do everything "right" and still end up having a child who rebels, makes bad choices as an adult, or walks away from the faith. There are a great many promises made to those who obey God, but my children have freewill, too. There are things I can do now to up the odds that my children will grow up to love and follow Jesus as adults, but I cannot guarantee it.

Ultimately, God will ask me how well I listened to and obeyed Him.  He will ask my adult children the same question about their own lives.

3.  We are ALL worthy of dignity, no matter what.  Jesus lowered Himself by taking on the form of a man.  He lived a life of near poverty in order to serve and minister to others.  He allowed His reputation to be marred by the company he kept: "tax collectors and sinners" so that those with whom He kept company might be redeemed.  He died in the most undignified way possible in that day-and-age: crucifixion.  He died a criminal's death, though He committed no crime.  Why?

To restore our dignity by restoring our relationship with God.

Humans were created in God's image.  This sets us above animals (Genesis 1:26) and even above angels (Hebrews 1:1-14).  When sin entered the world, humanity was stripped of our dignity by losing our special relationship with God.  Jesus' death and resurrection restore our dignity by making us right with God.

And what qualifies us to receive this dignity from Him?

Simply this: we are created in the image of God.

That's it.

That's all.

That's the only qualification.

Were you born?  Then you are made in the image of God and worthy of being treated with dignity.

Are you alive and breathing?  Then you are made in the image of God and worthy of being treated with dignity.

No matter what else describes us as individuals, we all have THIS in common:

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.   (Genesis 1:27, NASB) 

So who deserves to be treated by me with dignity?

Everyone.


Why do they deserve to be treated with dignity?

Because God created them in His image.


I find myself feeling much more compassionate toward those I see begging on the corners and toward those who have and are making foolish choices with their lives.  I can know that their choices are foolish, hurtful, or destructive and still treat them in a dignified way.

I will end with this powerful exchange between Jesus and some religious leaders:

“Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’

“Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 

“The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’”

(Matthew 25:34-40)

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*Note: There are many more stories of kids who have gone on from the orphanage to do great things and to live wonderfully dignified lives, loving Jesus and others, and raising healthy families of their own.  I think God prompted Carmen to share these harder stories in order to teach the full lesson I needed to learn: Bestow Dignity.  Let God handle the results.

Bestow Dignity: Biblical Examples, Part 1

Take a moment to meditate on the probable lifestyle and community acceptance of a person suffering from any of the following conditions in 1st century Israel:

• leprosy: a name applied to any number of skin diseases, many of which are highly contagious, destructive to the whole body, and terribly uncomfortable too look at.
• paralysis: a condition affecting an number of parts of the body and which severely hampers a person's mobility, ability to work, and ability to care for oneself.
• disfigurement: a part of the body has been irreparably damaged in an accident, did not form correctly in the womb, or did not grow normally for any number of reasons.
• blindness
• deafness
• tongue-tied or dumb (as in, unable to speak)
• perpetual internal bleeding
• crippling back pain
• demon-possession: sometimes leading to obvious lunatic behavior (such as living in a graveyard, nude, yelling, cursing at or attacking any passerby); other times allowing the person possessed to prophesy or tell the future; in other cases, causing a person to throw themselves into a fire or body of water; for others, affecting their ability to communicate.

Do you recognize these ailments?

During Jesus' 3-year earthly ministry, He regularly encountered those suffering with these maladies.  In reviewing a list of 40 Miracles of Jesus, I noted that in more than half of the accounts (22), Jesus demonstrated the power of God by healing those who suffered from these crippling physical problems.

Consider what healing would have meant for these men, women, and children.  Many of them were cast-offs of society.  The blind and crippled begged at the temple gates for any scraps or coins they could get.  They were likely very dirty from sitting in the roadways to beg and from being unable to care for themselves properly.  Others were banished to communities outside the city because of their ailments (e.g., the lepers), due to the danger to others from their communicable diseases. Consider the stench.  Consider the probable prevailing negative attitude toward those unable to work for their daily bread, get themselves around, or even keep themselves moderately clean.

Upon healing, these people would be able to re-enter society as productive members of the community.  They would no longer be uncomfortable or dangerous to be near.  They would no longer bear the shame of their maladies, but be able to hold their head high in a society with very little compassion for their needs.  The would be able to return to their families.

In healing these men and women, Jesus bestowed great dignity upon them.  First, in being willing to come near and to touch them.  Second, in restoring them to physical wholeness and giving them back the ability to conduct themselves as productive members of their communities.  Third, in the wake of their healing, many of these people became believers in Jesus, and as such, their spiritual trajectories were forever altered toward heaven, restored communion and fellowship with God Himself.

In addition to these stories of physical healing from maladies, disease, and demon-possession, there are accounts of Jesus restoring the sick: in large groups, as in Capernaum and Gennesart; or one at a time, as in the stories of the royal official's son (John 4), the Centurion's servant (Matthew 8, Luke 7), and Peter's mother-in-law (Matthew 8, Mark 1, Luke 4).  He also restored physical life to at least 3 people: the widow's son (Luke 7), Jairus' daughter (Matthew 9, Mark 5, Luke 8), and Lazarus (John 11).  Consider how meaningful and necessary it was for the widow and for Mary and Martha that their "men" be restored to life.  The widow's only means of support may have been her son.  The same is true for Mary and Martha.  Just think of what these women may all have suffered had their income-earning relatives stayed dead!  Jesus bestowed dignity on these women by providing for their well-being through the restoration of life to their male relatives!

When I've read these accounts of Jesus' miracles in the past, I've thought, "Being sick or disabled is so inconvenient and uncomfortable.  How nice for those people to be healthy again!"  Until my week in the Baja, I had not considered just how profoundly their healing would positively impact the remainder of their lives on earth.  Jesus' work in their lives changed not only their spiritual future, but their physical present.  His healing works restored or bestowed dignity.

* * *

Coming Soon in the series "Bestow Dignity"

~ Biblical Examples, Part 2: More from Jesus' life and ministry

• How Jesus bestowed dignity through life-changing, life-affirming conversations and encounters
• How Jesus bestowed dignity on the "lesser classes" by His treatment of them and teaching about them

~ Biblical Examples, Part 3: Jesus' Death and Resurrection

~ Biblical Examples, Part 4: A smattering of Old Testament examples

~ Dignity and Worldview

~ The Other Side of the Dignity Lesson: A very bitter pill to swallow

Bestow Dignity: Reflections on my week in the Baja

The following post just barely scratches the surface of all I want and need to share after my week in Mexico.  I must get something out there, but there is SO much more brewing in my heart and mind, and hopefully will be expressed and shared in future posts.

Love, 

Mama Bear

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Bestow Dignity.

The Holy Spirit whispered these two words into my heart on our very first morning in Vicente Guerrero.  We were on a tour of the Foundation campus and Carmen, the guest relations coordinator for FFHM, was sharing stories of the ministry itself as well as some of the individual children who have lived at the orphanage during its many years of operation.  Carmen did not do us a favor by sparing the details of their stories.  We heard heart-breaking stories of gruesome abuse and neglect inflicted on the powerless before they found their way to safety at the orphanage.  Carmen said, “We bring them in and we give them dignity: a bed of their own, a bathroom, a home, clean clothes and food, an education, and a safe place to grow up.”  

Something about that word dignity struck a very strong cord in my heart.

For the remainder of the tour and of our week, the Lord continued to draw my attention back to those two words: Bestow Dignity.  When we visited Rancho de Cristo, a recovery ranch for men, we heard stories of men who, by the power of the Word of God, came out of drug dealing, gangs, addictions, and more.  By the power of God in the lives of these men, they leave the Rancho no longer addicts, but Oaks of Righteousness, men whose lives, families, and futures are transformed.

When we visited children and families in various communities around the Foundation campus, we saw example after example of how God is using the outreach staff and volunteers to bestow dignity: providing breakfast to school children so they are better prepared to learn; teaching adults to read and write in their own language, to name just two. 

The campus-based ministries are also all examples of these two words in action:

• a learning center for special-needs children, where they learn that they ARE worthwhile individuals with gifts they can develop and exercise for the good of their community
• a day-care and preschool for children of single working moms, where the kids learn that they are worth loving, caring for, and teaching and their moms are daily encouraged that their children are valuable as much more than another pair of hands in the strawberry fields
• providing customized wheelchairs and prosthetic limbs to the lame, some of whom have never even seen the light outside their huts for lack of mobility, men and women who can now work because they can finally get around
• providing meals for those in need through the ministry of the soup kitchen, which also puts together food baskets for the families who visit
• providing medical, dental, and optical care through the services of the clinic
• providing children an excellent education, including English as a second language and training in job-skills, all embedded in a curriculum of Grace: God made you, He loves you, and that makes you worthy of value and respect
• rescuing children from abuse, neglect, prostitution, begging, back-breaking field labor, illiteracy, gangs, hunger
• providing adult diapers for those suffering from incontinence, helping these men and women to keep clean so they can participate in community without the shame of body odor, skin abrasions, and infection.
• providing household goods and clothing for those in need, as well as to the children, staff, and families who live and work at the Foundation campus.
• sharing their water resources when possible to put out fires in the community

This lesson is not one that I even had an inkling that I needed to learn, but oh how I needed to learn it!  As the week progressed and we continued to work alongside the people and to witness Kingdom work being done, the Spirit showed me biblical examples of God bestowing dignity on people, from the Old Testament and New.  So many of Jesus’ miracles directly bestowed dignity on someone who had been marginalized, abused, neglected, or rejected by society: the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, the woman with the bleeding disease, lepers, the blind, the possessed, the lame, men, women, and children, Jews, Gentiles, and Samaritans.  Because of Jesus’ work in their lives, these recipients of His mercy could re-enter society with dignity, no longer bearing the weight and the shame of disfiguring diseases or sinful pasts. 

Every time the Spirit showed me another story of bestowing dignity, my breath caught in wonder.  It all came together in the most beautiful way on our last day, as we toured Dorothy’s House, a safe-house and recovery home for abused women and their children.  As we wrapped up our tour and our week, the Spirit whispered to my heart, “Go and do likewise.”  These are the words Jesus said to His disciples after washing their feet.  He took the form of the lowest servant and washed His disciples’ dirty feet, bestowing on them the dignity both of clean feet and of putting Himself in a position of servant to them.  And after lowering Himself thus to elevate them, He commanded them, “Go and do likewise.”

The GOSPEL itself exploded for me with these two words: Bestow dignity.  I have very little idea how I am to apply this in my present circumstances as a wife and mom, but I want to try.  I have some ideas how I can apply it in my interactions with the community outside of my home, but I know that God is far from done with me in this lesson.  I know that, as a result of my time in the Baja, my understanding of Jesus and His work on the cross will never, ever be the same.  And I hope that how I see people, especially those most neglected, marginalized, and rejected by culture, will also be forever changed.

I never, ever want to forget this lesson.  If my husband would allow it, I might even consider getting these words tattooed on my wrist, as a permanent reminder and inspiration.  As a Christian, I have no doubt what my role in this world is: to be like Jesus and bestow upon others the dignity which He bestowed upon me when He died on the cross for my sins and gave me new life in His Name.