Bestow Dignity: Post topics to come

This theme is just exploding in my heart, mind, and spirit...it seems to me like it ought to absolutely rock (in a good way) Christianity as I (we) know it!

To those who have followed my series Bestow Dignity so far, THANK YOU for taking the time to read my thoughts!  I'd really love to know if this is helping or encouraging anyone else, so please feel free to comment.  (All I ask is that you practice consideration and respect for me and for others when sharing your thoughts and feedback.)

As a recap, here are the posts in this series so far.

#1: Bestow Dignity: Reflections on my week in the Baja

#2: Bestow Dignity: Biblical Examples, Part 1

#3: The Other (Harder) Side of the Dignity Lesson

I have at least 5 more posts to add to the series, something along the lines of...

~ Biblical Examples, Part 2: More from Jesus' Life and Ministry

~ Biblical Examples, Part 3: Jesus' Death & Resurrection

~ Biblical Examples, Part 4: A Smattering of Old Testament Examples

~ Dignity & Worldview

~ Dignity & Politics

If you'd like to automatically receive the follow-up posts, you can subscribe to the blog via the link provided, or you can just let me know and I'll email them as I write them :)

Thanks again for taking the time, thought, and energy to hear what I have to share!

The Other (Harder) Side of the Dignity Lesson

Photo Credit: Jamie Lynn Photography

Before I continue with biblical examples on the theme of Bestowing Dignity, I want to share the other - harder - side of the lesson I learned while in Mexico.

During the same tour on which God whispered the words bestow dignity, He also taught me a more difficult truth.  Carmen, our tour guide, was sharing some stories with us of kids who have left the orphanage only to make really bad choices with their lives*.  For example, there are girls who leave the very safe, dignified environment of the FFHM campus and go straight out to find a man.  The thought process here is that if she has a man's baby, he will then take care of her and she will be set for life.  Never mind the fact this has worked for almost no woman in the entire country.  So, off goes the 18 year old, she finds her man, produces a baby, and then finds herself left to fend for herself and her baby on her own.  Thus continues the cycle of poverty, abuse, and brokenness.

When our tour guide shared this very real example scenario, I felt a bit flabbergasted and even began to internally question the work being done with the orphaned kids living at FFHM.  In my very American thinking, A plus B automatically equals C...every single time, right?  In other words, take a child out of poverty and abuse (A), raise them with the love of Jesus, bestow dignity upon them, and meet all their needs (B), and automatically, they will become a fine, upstanding adult who makes wise and safe choices with their life and will walk the "straight and narrow" for the rest of their life (C).

With this mindset, I could not comprehend the fact that ANY of the kids rescued from abuse, neglect, and slavery to be raised instead at the orphanage -- especially THIS orphanage -- would go out to make such foolish choices!  (The girls are not the only ones, by the way.  There are boys who go out from their orphanage home and make foolish choices, too.)  In my linear, American thinking, I began to wonder if the orphanage staff and house parents were perhaps doing something WRONG in their raising and management of the kids.  I also became critical of the kids themselves.

These kids are given EVERYTHING they need for a safe, happy existence: safe shelter, loving house parents, 3 square meals a day, clean clothes, a high-quality education, and job-skills training.  How could they be anything but thankful?  How could they do anything but live out the remainder of their lives demonstrating this gratitude by becoming responsible, healthy, productive adults who love the Lord and live the "right" way?  Truly, I was shocked!  I had a very high and lofty impression of what should result for the kids who grow up in the orphanage.

God used Carmen's stories to knock that lofty impression right back down to earth!  And, boy-howdy, did it sting!

As the tour moved on to the sewing room, and these critical, unfriendly thoughts were stewing around in my brain, the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly into my heart it was almost audible.  This is what He said, "Crista, do not dare stand in judgement over these girls.  YOU are thinking from the perspective of privilege and plenty.  You have NO IDEA what these girls have been through.  You have NO IDEA what influences have shaped their thinking and beliefs.  You have NO RIGHT to judge them or their choices.  I AM their judge."

Oh wow.  Kick to the gut.

Amazingly my spirit responded, "Okay.  You're right.  I'm sorry."

Also amazingly, for the remainder of my week very few more of these critical thoughts crossed my mind.  Instead, my thoughts were dominated by all the examples for the positive side of the lesson...all that God's people are doing in the Baja to bestow dignity on others in the manner of Christ and His earthly ministry.

But back to the Hard Side of this lesson.

As we left the sewing room and continued with the tour, I began to comprehend a new truth regarding this bestowing of dignity.  It is the responsibility (and joy) of the follower of Christ to do the bestowing, whenever and however we can bestow it.  Whether it be the homeless, the family-less, the disabled, the addicted, the abused, the neglected, the hungry, the cold, the broken, the sick, the imprisoned or anyone else, MY job is to respond to the Lord as He leads me in His work of bestowing dignity on others.

What the recipient does with the dignity is between him or her and God.

My job is to bestow and let go.  When I stand before His throne in Heaven, God will hold me accountable for how well I listened to His voice and obeyed.

The other person will stand before Him and give account for what they did with the dignity bestowed upon them by God through His people working on His behalf.

In other words, what the other person does with the dignity bestowed has nothing to do with me.

This truth applies in pretty much every area of my life, most notably as a mom and as a member and partaker in community.  My responsibility is to know and obey God's commands.

As a mom, I am called to love my children and to raise them in the wisdom and instruction of the Lord.  What if I do that, and they still end up living rebelliously or making really bad choices as adults?  They will stand before God to give account for their choices.  I will stand before Him to give account for mine.

As a Christian member of the community, I am called to love, to share, to give generously and not to hoard for myself.  What if God asks me to give money to the man or woman in need and then they use it to buy drugs?  He or she will stand before God and give account for the blessing they received from His hand through one of His followers.  I will stand before Him to give account for my choice to obey Him in being generous.

As a Christian, I am also called to unashamedly proclaim the Gospel:

In this is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.  (1 John 4:10, MEV)

What if I share this truth, proclaim it from the rooftops with all gentleness, kindness, and patience and STILL a person rejects Jesus?  God will hold me accountable for obedience: did I take every opportunity to make the Good News known?  God will hold them accountable for how they responded to Him.

During my week in Mexico and since I've been home, God has been systematically shattering my linear, American thinking process regarding the matter of following Jesus in loving and serving others.  Here are a few of the sub-lessons I learned:

1.  God's economy does not operate by the same rules as the American economy.  Case in point: the parable of the shepherd who leaves the flock of 99 to find the 1 who went missing.  All the angels in heave rejoiced over the 1 recovered lamb.  (Matthew 18:12-14)

2.  We live in a broken world, so the equation is broken, too.  There are instructions in the Bible for how to raise children.  These instructions are wise and are given for the benefit of both the parents and the child.  However, we live in a broken world, so I can, as a mom, do everything "right" and still end up having a child who rebels, makes bad choices as an adult, or walks away from the faith. There are a great many promises made to those who obey God, but my children have freewill, too. There are things I can do now to up the odds that my children will grow up to love and follow Jesus as adults, but I cannot guarantee it.

Ultimately, God will ask me how well I listened to and obeyed Him.  He will ask my adult children the same question about their own lives.

3.  We are ALL worthy of dignity, no matter what.  Jesus lowered Himself by taking on the form of a man.  He lived a life of near poverty in order to serve and minister to others.  He allowed His reputation to be marred by the company he kept: "tax collectors and sinners" so that those with whom He kept company might be redeemed.  He died in the most undignified way possible in that day-and-age: crucifixion.  He died a criminal's death, though He committed no crime.  Why?

To restore our dignity by restoring our relationship with God.

Humans were created in God's image.  This sets us above animals (Genesis 1:26) and even above angels (Hebrews 1:1-14).  When sin entered the world, humanity was stripped of our dignity by losing our special relationship with God.  Jesus' death and resurrection restore our dignity by making us right with God.

And what qualifies us to receive this dignity from Him?

Simply this: we are created in the image of God.

That's it.

That's all.

That's the only qualification.

Were you born?  Then you are made in the image of God and worthy of being treated with dignity.

Are you alive and breathing?  Then you are made in the image of God and worthy of being treated with dignity.

No matter what else describes us as individuals, we all have THIS in common:

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.   (Genesis 1:27, NASB) 

So who deserves to be treated by me with dignity?

Everyone.


Why do they deserve to be treated with dignity?

Because God created them in His image.


I find myself feeling much more compassionate toward those I see begging on the corners and toward those who have and are making foolish choices with their lives.  I can know that their choices are foolish, hurtful, or destructive and still treat them in a dignified way.

I will end with this powerful exchange between Jesus and some religious leaders:

“Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’

“Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 

“The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’”

(Matthew 25:34-40)

* * *

*Note: There are many more stories of kids who have gone on from the orphanage to do great things and to live wonderfully dignified lives, loving Jesus and others, and raising healthy families of their own.  I think God prompted Carmen to share these harder stories in order to teach the full lesson I needed to learn: Bestow Dignity.  Let God handle the results.

Bestow Dignity: Biblical Examples, Part 1

Take a moment to meditate on the probable lifestyle and community acceptance of a person suffering from any of the following conditions in 1st century Israel:

• leprosy: a name applied to any number of skin diseases, many of which are highly contagious, destructive to the whole body, and terribly uncomfortable too look at.
• paralysis: a condition affecting an number of parts of the body and which severely hampers a person's mobility, ability to work, and ability to care for oneself.
• disfigurement: a part of the body has been irreparably damaged in an accident, did not form correctly in the womb, or did not grow normally for any number of reasons.
• blindness
• deafness
• tongue-tied or dumb (as in, unable to speak)
• perpetual internal bleeding
• crippling back pain
• demon-possession: sometimes leading to obvious lunatic behavior (such as living in a graveyard, nude, yelling, cursing at or attacking any passerby); other times allowing the person possessed to prophesy or tell the future; in other cases, causing a person to throw themselves into a fire or body of water; for others, affecting their ability to communicate.

Do you recognize these ailments?

During Jesus' 3-year earthly ministry, He regularly encountered those suffering with these maladies.  In reviewing a list of 40 Miracles of Jesus, I noted that in more than half of the accounts (22), Jesus demonstrated the power of God by healing those who suffered from these crippling physical problems.

Consider what healing would have meant for these men, women, and children.  Many of them were cast-offs of society.  The blind and crippled begged at the temple gates for any scraps or coins they could get.  They were likely very dirty from sitting in the roadways to beg and from being unable to care for themselves properly.  Others were banished to communities outside the city because of their ailments (e.g., the lepers), due to the danger to others from their communicable diseases. Consider the stench.  Consider the probable prevailing negative attitude toward those unable to work for their daily bread, get themselves around, or even keep themselves moderately clean.

Upon healing, these people would be able to re-enter society as productive members of the community.  They would no longer be uncomfortable or dangerous to be near.  They would no longer bear the shame of their maladies, but be able to hold their head high in a society with very little compassion for their needs.  The would be able to return to their families.

In healing these men and women, Jesus bestowed great dignity upon them.  First, in being willing to come near and to touch them.  Second, in restoring them to physical wholeness and giving them back the ability to conduct themselves as productive members of their communities.  Third, in the wake of their healing, many of these people became believers in Jesus, and as such, their spiritual trajectories were forever altered toward heaven, restored communion and fellowship with God Himself.

In addition to these stories of physical healing from maladies, disease, and demon-possession, there are accounts of Jesus restoring the sick: in large groups, as in Capernaum and Gennesart; or one at a time, as in the stories of the royal official's son (John 4), the Centurion's servant (Matthew 8, Luke 7), and Peter's mother-in-law (Matthew 8, Mark 1, Luke 4).  He also restored physical life to at least 3 people: the widow's son (Luke 7), Jairus' daughter (Matthew 9, Mark 5, Luke 8), and Lazarus (John 11).  Consider how meaningful and necessary it was for the widow and for Mary and Martha that their "men" be restored to life.  The widow's only means of support may have been her son.  The same is true for Mary and Martha.  Just think of what these women may all have suffered had their income-earning relatives stayed dead!  Jesus bestowed dignity on these women by providing for their well-being through the restoration of life to their male relatives!

When I've read these accounts of Jesus' miracles in the past, I've thought, "Being sick or disabled is so inconvenient and uncomfortable.  How nice for those people to be healthy again!"  Until my week in the Baja, I had not considered just how profoundly their healing would positively impact the remainder of their lives on earth.  Jesus' work in their lives changed not only their spiritual future, but their physical present.  His healing works restored or bestowed dignity.

* * *

Coming Soon in the series "Bestow Dignity"

~ Biblical Examples, Part 2: More from Jesus' life and ministry

• How Jesus bestowed dignity through life-changing, life-affirming conversations and encounters
• How Jesus bestowed dignity on the "lesser classes" by His treatment of them and teaching about them

~ Biblical Examples, Part 3: Jesus' Death and Resurrection

~ Biblical Examples, Part 4: A smattering of Old Testament examples

~ Dignity and Worldview

~ The Other Side of the Dignity Lesson: A very bitter pill to swallow

Bestow Dignity: Reflections on my week in the Baja

The following post just barely scratches the surface of all I want and need to share after my week in Mexico.  I must get something out there, but there is SO much more brewing in my heart and mind, and hopefully will be expressed and shared in future posts.

Love, 

Mama Bear

* * *

Bestow Dignity.

The Holy Spirit whispered these two words into my heart on our very first morning in Vicente Guerrero.  We were on a tour of the Foundation campus and Carmen, the guest relations coordinator for FFHM, was sharing stories of the ministry itself as well as some of the individual children who have lived at the orphanage during its many years of operation.  Carmen did not do us a favor by sparing the details of their stories.  We heard heart-breaking stories of gruesome abuse and neglect inflicted on the powerless before they found their way to safety at the orphanage.  Carmen said, “We bring them in and we give them dignity: a bed of their own, a bathroom, a home, clean clothes and food, an education, and a safe place to grow up.”  

Something about that word dignity struck a very strong cord in my heart.

For the remainder of the tour and of our week, the Lord continued to draw my attention back to those two words: Bestow Dignity.  When we visited Rancho de Cristo, a recovery ranch for men, we heard stories of men who, by the power of the Word of God, came out of drug dealing, gangs, addictions, and more.  By the power of God in the lives of these men, they leave the Rancho no longer addicts, but Oaks of Righteousness, men whose lives, families, and futures are transformed.

When we visited children and families in various communities around the Foundation campus, we saw example after example of how God is using the outreach staff and volunteers to bestow dignity: providing breakfast to school children so they are better prepared to learn; teaching adults to read and write in their own language, to name just two. 

The campus-based ministries are also all examples of these two words in action:

• a learning center for special-needs children, where they learn that they ARE worthwhile individuals with gifts they can develop and exercise for the good of their community
• a day-care and preschool for children of single working moms, where the kids learn that they are worth loving, caring for, and teaching and their moms are daily encouraged that their children are valuable as much more than another pair of hands in the strawberry fields
• providing customized wheelchairs and prosthetic limbs to the lame, some of whom have never even seen the light outside their huts for lack of mobility, men and women who can now work because they can finally get around
• providing meals for those in need through the ministry of the soup kitchen, which also puts together food baskets for the families who visit
• providing medical, dental, and optical care through the services of the clinic
• providing children an excellent education, including English as a second language and training in job-skills, all embedded in a curriculum of Grace: God made you, He loves you, and that makes you worthy of value and respect
• rescuing children from abuse, neglect, prostitution, begging, back-breaking field labor, illiteracy, gangs, hunger
• providing adult diapers for those suffering from incontinence, helping these men and women to keep clean so they can participate in community without the shame of body odor, skin abrasions, and infection.
• providing household goods and clothing for those in need, as well as to the children, staff, and families who live and work at the Foundation campus.
• sharing their water resources when possible to put out fires in the community

This lesson is not one that I even had an inkling that I needed to learn, but oh how I needed to learn it!  As the week progressed and we continued to work alongside the people and to witness Kingdom work being done, the Spirit showed me biblical examples of God bestowing dignity on people, from the Old Testament and New.  So many of Jesus’ miracles directly bestowed dignity on someone who had been marginalized, abused, neglected, or rejected by society: the woman at the well, the woman caught in adultery, the woman with the bleeding disease, lepers, the blind, the possessed, the lame, men, women, and children, Jews, Gentiles, and Samaritans.  Because of Jesus’ work in their lives, these recipients of His mercy could re-enter society with dignity, no longer bearing the weight and the shame of disfiguring diseases or sinful pasts. 

Every time the Spirit showed me another story of bestowing dignity, my breath caught in wonder.  It all came together in the most beautiful way on our last day, as we toured Dorothy’s House, a safe-house and recovery home for abused women and their children.  As we wrapped up our tour and our week, the Spirit whispered to my heart, “Go and do likewise.”  These are the words Jesus said to His disciples after washing their feet.  He took the form of the lowest servant and washed His disciples’ dirty feet, bestowing on them the dignity both of clean feet and of putting Himself in a position of servant to them.  And after lowering Himself thus to elevate them, He commanded them, “Go and do likewise.”

The GOSPEL itself exploded for me with these two words: Bestow dignity.  I have very little idea how I am to apply this in my present circumstances as a wife and mom, but I want to try.  I have some ideas how I can apply it in my interactions with the community outside of my home, but I know that God is far from done with me in this lesson.  I know that, as a result of my time in the Baja, my understanding of Jesus and His work on the cross will never, ever be the same.  And I hope that how I see people, especially those most neglected, marginalized, and rejected by culture, will also be forever changed.

I never, ever want to forget this lesson.  If my husband would allow it, I might even consider getting these words tattooed on my wrist, as a permanent reminder and inspiration.  As a Christian, I have no doubt what my role in this world is: to be like Jesus and bestow upon others the dignity which He bestowed upon me when He died on the cross for my sins and gave me new life in His Name.

The Cross Has TWO Pieces...On Purpose!

A word picture of sorts has been tumbling around in my brain now for some time.  This will be my effort to get it out of my head, begin to process it through, and share it with others, because I don't think I can or should keep this one to myself!

I will not pretend to have stumbled upon anything earth-shattering or unique.  Rather, I believe the Holy Spirit has granted me the gift of a picture to help me understand how I should live as a Christian in the world.

Before I continue, however, I must share that I feel I may be rather "exposing" myself in a vulnerable way with this post.  I realize I'm hitting on some hot-button issues, but I honestly-and-truly have no desire to start a fight, debate, or argument.  I'm simply trying to share a truth I've stumbled on as I've studied the Bible and lived life.  So, for now, I implore my readers (if there are any), to please do me the honor of the following...

~ Recognize that I know there is much to be explored as it relates to these thoughts.

~ Recognize that I am not a seminary-trained theologian.  I am simply a lay-person communicating her thoughts and discoveries as I spend time each day in the Bible and try to learn how to live in light of it.  (I figure if it's good enough for the likes of C.S. Lewis, then it's good enough for me.)

~ Recognize that no good can come from harsh criticism, debates over semantics, or defensive argument in response to what I've written.  I value relationships with those who read my work MUCH more than you probably realize and I don't want the thoughts shared here to be the cause of brokenness.

In other words, should you choose to respond or comment...please, be kind.  And please, give my intentions the benefit of the doubt.

Additionally, I am happy to explore this topic further with others, but would probably prefer to do so in face-to-face conversation (for now), rather than in writing (i.e., emails or comment strings).

And now, without further ado...

The Cross has TWO Pieces...

On Purpose!

Premise:

The cross of Jesus Christ represents the complete picture of how Christian faith ought to be lived out in a believer's life.

Religious Faith

The upright post in this picture represents the vertical piece of the cross of Christ.  This vertical piece points my eyes toward heaven, to the God who created and is sovereign over all of the universe.  To God, Who was, and is, and is to come.  To God, Who created humanity in His own image and, in so doing, gave humanity a special place among all of creation.  To God, Who lovingly and with unfathomable wisdom communicated His nature to humanity through nature and through Scripture and Who "set eternity in the hearts of men" (Ecclesiastes 3:11), that we might desire to know Him.  Not only did He communicate His nature to us, He communicated also that which humanity must know and do to come into and remain in right relationship with Himself.

This vertical piece includes the foundation of our faith.  It is firmly planted in the ground in order to hold other parts up.

But, on its own, this post is not a cross.

And, like this post, a faith that focuses always, only on God and which expends no energy to understand our place in the world of people, is an incomplete faith.  *I* call this Religious Faith.

Religious faith is concerned with following rules and performing works in order that the follower maintain a right relationship with God and, thereby, gain something from Him, be it blessing from heaven in this life or entrance to heaven for the next.  Religious faith concerns itself entirely or mostly with high theological concepts and practices that keep the follower "clean" of sin.  Have you ever heard someone say of another, "The man is so heavenly minded that he is no earthly good."  A person whose faith is wholly fixed on the vertical post of the cross is, I believe, like that man.  They are so totally focused on knowing and believing the right things, but there is something lacking, so their faith, at best, falls flat or, at worst, comes down like a 1,000 pound hammer of guilt on others.  Either way, I do not believe this is the complete life of faith Jesus intended for us to live.  

A vertical post is not the whole picture.

Practical Faith

In my experience, practical faith is the kind that focuses its effort almost entirely on doing what Jesus did: serving others, righting injustice, giving, healing, reaching out, meeting needs, and declaring the need for peace among and between peoples of every race and tribe.  This faith expresses itself in extraordinarily practical and people-centered ways and can, in fact, be wondrous in its beauty in our communities.

However, I have observed too often practical faith losing its faith and simply becoming "practical."  That is, what started out as a sideways expression of a vertical belief becomes a sideways expression lacking Truth for its foundation.  It becomes, like this log, a stick lying on the ground.  This faith is willing to make itself "muddy" for others (like the underside of this log), but ultimately, it is still a stick on the ground and going no where.  It's ends point those who see it to other people and other people cannot fill the God-shaped void in every heart.  Sometimes, this stick-on-the-ground may, in fact, become a stumbling block to others on their way to seeking God.  Those who see the good works of those with practical faith can end up missing entirely the God who inspires the practical and loving work done by these people.  They may end up worshiping, in a sense, those doing the good deeds, rather than turning their own eyes to the One who inspired the good works in the first place.

A horizontal post is an essential piece of the cross, but it is not the whole picture.

I firmly believe that both Religious (vertical-only) and Practical (horizontal only) faith are incomplete pictures of the Gospel of Jesus.  With both, one or the other main messages of Jesus' earthly ministry and of the Bible as a whole is missing.  That's why I seek to live out what I call Transforming Faith.

Transforming Faith

Transforming faith is both pieces of the cross: the vertical post AND the horizontal bar.

The vertical post points my eyes toward heaven, as I described above.  And once my eyes are fixed on heaven, on the God who created, loves, and redeemed me, the horizontal bar points my attention to the side: to people who need Jesus' love and ministry just as much as me.

I believe that Transforming faith...

~ allows the believer to come into and remain in right relationship with both God and others.

~ works out head- and heart-knowledge in acts of service and generosity toward others so that those others will also find the blessing of peace with God and with others through the cross of Jesus.

~ is what makes us a "City on a Hill," shining forth the LIGHT of God (Truth) by doing the work of Jesus in the world (healing, serving, giving, building up, encouraging, bringing peace, etc.)

For scriptural "backing" for this idea, let us turn our attention to the The Ten Commandments:

(See the book of Exodus for complete context).

It was many years into my Christian walk before I noticed that there's a distinct pattern in the 10 commandments: the first four commandments  keep us in right relationship with God while the last 6 keep us in right relationship with others.

Hmmm...a representation of the vertical relationship (between God and man) AND the horizontal relationship (between man and man).

After I reread the commandments this morning, I went looking for a New Testament passage wherein Jesus answers what the Sadducees thought was a tricky question, "Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?" (Matthew 22:36)

Here is how Jesus answered: 

"You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  The is the great and foremost commandment."

Matthew 22:37, 38

{"Ah-hah!" thinks I.  "The vertical piece of the cross!}

"The second is like it, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

(Matthew 22:39)

{"By Jove!  There's the horizontal piece!}

"On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets."

(Matthew 22:40)

And that, my friends, is the WHOLE Gospel.  Did you catch it?  "On these TWO commandments..." Jesus came that we might come into and remain in right relationship with God AND my being in right relationship with Him ought to mean that I come into right relationship with others by living out practical love toward others, which puts me in right relationship with others!

And this is there I come to a sudden, jolting halt in my written explanation and exploration of this idea...for now.  I know that there should be SO much more written to completely explore this word picture, but -- to be honest -- I just don't have it in me right now!  This concept needs a lot more time and attention, but I want to get the idea out there, to some specific people for now and so, for now, I'll be content to end this here.

iMamá se va a México!

(That is: Mama is going to Mexico!)

Back in November, the Sunday morning announcements began to include an invitation to consider participating in a short term mission trip to the Foundation for His Ministries (FFHM) campus in Vicente Guerrero, Mexico.

Having recently welcomed home a friend from her own short-term mission experience to Tanzania, I (Crista) was feeling the itch to board a plane myself and serve in God's Kingdom work somewhere else in the world.  This shouldn't shock anyone who knows me.  After all, I have been to Mexico three times, Italy once, and Mongolia twice as a short-term missionary.  (It was my hope to add Kenya to the list last year, but the upheaval of our lives in the move from Albany to Vancouver prevented this.)  My friend encouraged me in my interest in joining her in a similar trip coming up this Spring.

It is in this context that David and I first heard the announcement about the formation of a team from Laurelwood Baptist Church.  David immediately suggested that I consider joining the team and I made sure to pick up a brochure from the missions table before leaving church that Sunday.

I read the brochure and my enthusiasm for this particular trip waned...immediately.  The trip was being "advertised" as a great FIRST experience in international missions.  It would involve helping with "chores" around the FFHM compound, participating in Bible lessons and activities in the local community, and visiting some of the other ministries in the area over the one-week span of the trip.  I thought to myself, "Eh...been there, done that.  Not interested."

That was BEFORE I met and spoke with Bob & Sue.  Bob & Sue are long-time members of LBC.  Since retiring several years ago, Bob & Sue travel to Vicente Guerrero for 3-4 months out of each winter to serve in the ongoing ministry of FFHM there.  Hearing their heart and passion for the ministry piqued my interested and I began to reconsider.  I actually began to wonder if FFHM was where I traveled with my college/young-adult youth group as a freshman in college.  Although the initial information session for the team had already passed by this time (mid December), I asked Sue to please contact the team leader, Michelle, and ask her to email me with more information about the team and the trip.

Again, I read the information from Michelle and thought, "Nah...not interested.  Maybe next year."  I replied in this vein to Michelle's email and said we'd be happy to support as we were able from home,  I felt rather relaxed about this decision and almost forgot about the whole thing.

A strange thing happened, though...a few days later, at the ladies' Bible study gathering I attend on Tuesdays, another young mom (Sue's daughter-in-law, Allison) approached me and said, "I heard you're going to Mexico this spring!  I'm going too!"

Uhm...awkward pause.

"Well, actually...I decided NOT to go.  Maybe next year."

"Oh," said Allison.  "I was really looking forward to going on the trip with you and getting to know you better."

Hmmm...the insecure middle schooler I harbor deep inside pricked up her ears at this.  Someone else...someone I admire and respect and who seems so "cool" wants ME to be on the team, too?

I'd have to think on this.

The following Sunday, after Sunday school, I asked Sue how the team was coming together.  "They're still waiting for one more," she said.

More thinking.

I asked Sue to pray specifically for me while she prayed for the team, that God would make Himself clear to me, if I was to join the team.  This issue just wasn't going away and I began to seriously wonder if I was missing something.

In the subsequent week two weeks, a few important things happened...

First, I decided to attend the next Mexico team meeting (which had been rescheduled from Sunday, January 18th to the 25th)...just to find out more.

Second, on the Monday between the original meeting date and the actual meeting, I was given the book She is Mine: A War Orphans Incredible Journey of Survival (by Stephanie Fast) and devoured it in the span of two (very late) evenings.  This woman's story of survival as a Korean War orphan gripped me and I put the book down in tears.  God was rekindling in my heart a long-dormant desire to be part of His work to care for orphans around the world.

Third, on the Thursday before the meeting, Miss Gloria found me at MOPS and said, "Crista, you ARE going to Mexico."  Who is Gloria and why does her opinion count?  Because she a godly woman advanced in years, experience, and wisdom who does a LOT of work with the young moms and kids in our church.  I was asking God to make Himself clear.  He knows me.  He knows what I need to hear.  Gloria's declaration was, I think, #3 out of 3 confirmations.  (My mom has told me on more than one occasion that God's direction comes in threes.  I don't know if this is "Capital T" Truth or not, but the pattern IS evident in my life.)

By the time the 25th rolled around, however, I was still undecided, even with Gloria's solid declaration of my place on the team.  I had been thinking about the team and the trip almost constantly and wondered if I should go or not.  This was the first time I was being invited and prompted to go on an international mission trip that I was not FEELING like I wanted to go.  I was concerned about getting hot and dirty, about who would take care of my girls if I go, and about "raising support."  Also, I felt like the "confirmations" I was seeing came in the form of PEOPLE...other women, in particular.  I did not want to sign up and commit to a mission trip just because women I like at church were saying I should go.  I wanted to KNOW that this was God's will for me in THIS season and at THIS time and to THIS location.

Where was David in all of this?

Well, when I asked David (who had, I remind you, suggested it in the first place), he said, "If you want to go, Go.  I support you and we'll figure out the details.  It's a good opportunity to get in close on what our church is doing in world missions and you've been wanting to go somewhere.  I went to Kenya...now it's your turn.  This seems like a good opportunity, but it's up to you."

Oh. my. goodness.  God was leading and directing, but He was not making it easy!  At least, that's how it felt.

Finally, Sunday the 25th was upon me, but I was no closer to a decision.  Instead of going to Sunday school class with David, I dropped the girls off in their classes and went to find a quiet spot to catch up on my Bible-in-a-year-maybe reading plan.  I've been in the book of Matthew, reading about Jesus' life and ministry.  Before cracking open my Bible, I prayed and asked God to clearly show me confirmation from HIS word about the decision I should make regarding the Mexico team.  I was NOT disappointed.  He used Jesus' own words-in-red to do it!

Jesus was going through all the cities and villages, teaching in their synagogues and proclaiming the gospel of the kingdom, and healing every kind of disease and every kind of sickness.  Seeing the people, He felt compassion on them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd.  Then He said to His disciples, "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.  Therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest."  

Matthew 9:35-38

This was the verse I needed.  In response to this passage, I recorded in my notes the following...

Lord, am I being called to drop what I'm doing here at home to go into the harvest?  Need I not understand the OBVIOUS reason to go and just...go?  Trusting that You see the bigger picture, and that You know the impact of an American church team coming in for a week to help...just coming alongside the people in their work to lighten their burden?  Why wouldn't I want to do that?

You see, what was really holding me back was a lack of "want to" and a bit of pride. I was feeling like this trip to Mexico wasn't a big deal for ME.  As I said above, "been there...done that."  When I was a high school kid preparing to go to Mexico, I was thrilled at the prospect of doing BIG things for God by allowing my easy American lifestyle to be interrupted for a week by a trip to Mexico.  As I prepared for Italy and Mongolia, I felt similarly...that I was preparing to do BIG things for God.  And maybe BIG things did happen as a result of my participation on those teams.  I know big things happened in my heart each time.  Whether or not I had a specific, lasting, spiritual impact on anyone I met, helped, served, or spoke to on any of these trips is unknowable to me right now. Only God sees the bigger picture...the top of the tapestry as the beautiful picture comes together.

Sitting at the 60s-era dining table in the church kitchen, I realized that this trip was not about doing BIG things for God.  It's about doing little things...little things that matter to Him.

We'll be doing many little things as a team this April when we travel to Mexico.  You see, FFHM is a self-sustaining ministry.  There's an orphanage of 90 kids, a learning center for disabled children, a day care and preschool for the children of single mothers, a multi-acre macadamia nut orchard, and a garden on the property.  They do not need our team in order to run all of these projects effectively and successfully.  They have enough staff and local volunteers.  Rather, our team will have the pleasure of coming alongside those already doing the work and simply joining in for a week.  We'll join in the work around the compound and in some activities in the local community run by the FFHM staff, like doing Bible lessons and activities with local children, visiting a ministry for men coming out of drug and alcohol addiction, and visiting a ministry for displaced single moms who are learning skills necessary to earn an income for themselves and their families.  We'll also spend one evening watching over some of the orphans who live at the campus, so that their house parents can have an evening off.  God only knows what else we'll be asked and invited to do while we're there.

This littleness of what we'll be doing is exactly why I'm NOW feeling so excited about being part of this team to Mexico in April.  I get to enjoy serving alongside my brothers and sisters in Christ in Mexico, caring for orphans and for the greater community i myriad little ways, trusting the results entirely to God.  Only HE knows the impact we will have.  Only HE knows the ripple effects of our actions, of our participation.  And I absolutely LOVE that He can be trusted with this information, for with God, all things are possible, so what seems very little now may become -- in His Time, by His Power, and in His Way -- very BIG results in the broad scope of His Kingdom work being accomplished on earth as it is in Heaven.

Last week at this time, I was ambivalent.

Today I am excited.

I get to go be little for a week in Mexico.  And I'm really looking forward to it!

God's Grace is Real

Before I share the meat of my thoughts on this subject, I want to give some context:

First...
We've slowly discovered over the summer that Emma has illness-related asthma.  This means that when she gets a cold, her lungs react by tightening in the bronchial passage ways.  As a result, all the stuff that gets down into her lungs as a result of a cold has an impossible time getting OUT because the airways are restricted.  We have Albuterol on hand for Emma in two forms: an inhaler and a nebulizer (a cute little panda bear machine).  This medication is only to be taken as-needed, spaced 4 hours, at least, between each dosage.  So far, these two tools have helped Emma greatly through two summer colds.

Second...
I've recently been reading C.S. Lewis' classic Mere Christianity.  Though I've been a Christian for more than 20 years and it has been suggested to me many dozens of times before, I've never read this book before.  As I read now, I am absolutely flabbergasted at both Lewis' understanding and his communication of Christian theology.  The way he presents and discusses difficult, but essential, topics in the Christian faith is incredibly refreshing, encouraging, and freeing!  I have been especially impacted by the chapter in which Lewis discusses Time (Book 4, I think).  I couldn't possibly relate that information here in any way that would do it justice, so...just read the book.  Seriously.  It's very good stuff.  Just keep in mind as you read on that this is what is bouncing around in my head, heart, and spirit as we found ourselves in an urgent medical situation last night with Emma.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

Emma has picked up another cold.  The germs could have come from any number of settings and any number of other children.  The source of the cold is not terribly important to me.  What is, however, of great importance is the fact that colds are not a simple affair for Emma.  She develops asthma when she is sick, which complicates her medical situation very rapidly.

The cold symptoms began for Emma on Friday morning: drippy nose led to post-nasal drip which led to coughing.  She did okay on Friday, but we did have a busy day with grocery shopping and other household chores.  Friday night she slept poorly because she was waking up coughing or so stuffed she was having trouble breathing well enough to sleep.  I also had a bad night.  Not just because of Emma, but because even after Emma settled down into good sleep, I was wired and didn't fall asleep until close to 2 a.m.  This did not bode well for either of us for our planned zoo trip on Saturday.

Emma woke up Saturday seeming much better.  We were in a hurry to get to the zoo (with my sister and her family, who were visiting after long-last from Springfield), so I didn't take the time for a full nebulizer treatment for Emma.  Additionally, she didn't get her morning nap, so by the time we got to the zoo, she wasn't really in a great state of well-being.  We figured, however, that she would be somewhat stationary for this trip (riding in the pack on Daddy's back), so she would be okay.  Before going into the zoo, I gave her an inhaler dose of her medication and we set off.

Emma continually coughed (light, but persistent) throughout our trip.  Around and after lunch, she seemed downright miserable and exhausted.  She was having a little more trouble breathing, so I went ahead with another dose on the inhaler, even though it hadn't yet been 4 hours.  This helped a little and she feel asleep on my back for a little while, but she was still a very unhappy baby.

After a quick trip to Abby's favorite animals, the elephants and the giraffes, we bid our farewells to my sister, brother-in-law, and nieces and headed for home.  On the way home, I called the advice nurse via Emma's pediatrician's office.  Based on my conversation with her, we went ahead with a nebulizer treatment for Emma when we got home, even though it wasn't yet 4 hours since the inhaler.  This seemed to help Emma relax and we put both girls down for naps.  Emma slept...sort of...but not well.  (I got some sleep, too, which was very good, because Emma's continued coughing was turning me into a tearful mess in my exhausted, worried state.)

Emma woke from her nap cheerful, breathing somewhat better, and playful.  But as she played, her breathing became again more rapid than I thought healthy and her tummy seemed to be working awfully hard to keep the air going in and out of her lungs.  (I was to understand later that what I was observing was, in fact, retraction...which is bad and a sign of distressed breathing and the need for medical support.)  I called the advice nurse again and she told me what to watch for: rapid breathing (check), bluish-white hue around her mouth and nose (not so much), and retraction (check).  She was two for three.

At 6:30, Emma and I were in the car (which was low on gas) and on our way to the 24/7 Urgent Care clinic at PeaceHealth in downtown Vancouver.  I was beginning to feel fearful and emotionally exhausted, and dreaded another "ER" type visit.  I am so grateful for how the Holy Spirit got my attention and reminded me to pray.  I had put in our "Hidden in My Heart" lullaby CD as we drove, and the song for Philippians 4:6-7 came on.

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With the lullaby playing in the background, I began to pray as I drove...

Lord, You created Emma and you knew at her conception that her lungs wouldn't be just right.  You have been with every parent of a child who is suffering throughout history and in the present and I know You are with us now.  You know what Emma needs.  Please be with me and help me to be strong and brave and calm.  Help us to be good patients and to have the grace we need for each moment of our journey tonight.  Help us feel Your Presence.

From that moment on -- miraculous -- I felt a wonderful, blessed peace over us.  Emma was calm and even somewhat chipper.  I knew that, whatever happened, I could trust God with the process and the results.

Emma and I arrived at the 24-hour urgent care clinic at 7:00 pm and were in a room by 7:15.  This was the first blessing.  Because of her age, her history, and her breathing pattern, they got us in quickly.  We immediately had two nurses tending us.  They were lovely women, very gentle and caring, very thorough and confident in their initial analysis of Emma's medical needs.  The nurse found Emma's temperature was up to 101 and her o-sat (oxygen saturation) level was down to 92% (which is low for a healthy infant).  After this initial assessment, it was mere minutes until the "provider" (doctor) was with us.  After observing Emma's breathing behaviors and listening to her lungs, the doctor quickly sent for assistants who would set Emma up with a nebulizer treatment of two asthma medications AND oxygen.  The assistants were there with the oxygen tank, neb mask, and meds almost before I could blink.  Emma was receiving the support she needed and her body immediately showed improvement.

Emma took this all like a champion, even the nurse finding her temperature in the MOST personally intrusive and uncomfortable manner.  Emma doesn't much like the nebulizer, but she's become really patient with the mask and tubes and vapor blowing in her face.  I was so proud of her and so thankful for this working of God's grace in our situation.

The hospital which houses this urgent care clinic does not, to my understanding, house a pediatric unit.  Therefore, in order for Emma to get the best care, the doctor felt it best for Emma to be transported to an ER in the area with doctors who would know better how to care for a pediatric patient with breathing trouble.  To my surprise, this was not as simple as my putting Emma back in the car and driving to the suggested hospital.  Rather, the doctor wanted us to go by ambulance, so that Emma's status could be monitored throughout the journey.

I ran out to the van to grab the car seat while the nurses held Emma and the medics prepared the ambulance to transport her to Randall Children's Hospital in Portland.  The medics were very kind and gentle and competent in their tasks.  However, the medic attending to Emma told me that he wanted to fit Emma with an IV before we headed off.  I think this is standard procedure.  I was none too thrilled to hear this bit of news.  I've had my own trouble with IVs and I just really, really didn't want to have Emma go through that.  But I steeled myself for the task ahead and continued to pray.  God had faithfully surrounded us with His grace so far, so I had no reason to doubt His continued help for the steps ahead.

After settling Emma and I in to the ambulance, the medic said, "I'm going to see if I can find a clear, easy shot for the IV.  If I can't, we won't try.  We'll just wait until we get to Randall."

I have never been more thankful for my body's tendency towards tricky veins!  I'm pretty sure Emma has inherited a lot of my physical characteristics because, thanks be to God, the medic could NOT find that easy shot.  So, he gave up on the IV and we headed out for Randall.

Along the way to the ER, Emma was still on Oxygen and her O-sats were up to 100%.  It was a short, easy journey and we were settled in at the Randall ER before 9:00 pm.  The nurses and providers at Randall were wonderful.  So kind and gentle and quiet and calm.  I told the doctor later that it felt like 5-star medical care.  I was amazed at their efficiency!  Yet they did everything calmly and used quiet voices and took such care with Emma and myself.  Such a contrast to our previous experience at a hospital ER in a small city elsewhere in Oregon.  (I don't wish to criticize that ER staff too much, because we were in a small city and they were not pediatric specialists.)

The doctor was in to see us very quickly.  He determined to give Emma a steroid tablet (in order to calm the inflammation in her lungs) and wanted to observe her for another hour or so before deciding if she needed to be admitted.  There was no further talk of IVs or blood draws or chest X-rays.  Her lungs, at this point, were free of wheezing and the doctor heard no indication of pneumonia.  Praise the Lord!

By 10:00, the doctor had determined that it was more than safe to send Emma home, with a 5-day Rx for steroids and a plan for us to follow-up with Emma's doctor on Monday.  Emma, by this point, was sleeping soundly on the hospital bed, breathing easily and so at peace.  I almost hated to disturb her to go home, but I was also so thankful for the good news and positive outcome of the evening.  By 10:30 we were packed up in a cab and headed back to the van, which was still parked at the hospital in downtown Vancouver.  God even demonstrated His grace in our cab ride, in that I felt confident to direct our cabbie back to the van, rather than taking us home.  If we had gone home, instead, we would have had another $20 or so on our cab bill and would have had to figure out how to get back to our van, and Abigail's car seat, on Sunday.

Emma and I were home, and she was settled peacefully in bed, by 11:15 pm.  I guess 5 hours probably sounds like a long time, but -- truthfully -- it didn't feel long as we experienced it.  There no long, drawn-out waits to be seen by a provider or to receive the prescribed treatment.  The cab even arrived at the hospital in only 10 or 15 minutes, instead of the predicted 25.  Every person who attended us was kind, gentle, caring, calm, and confident (without being arrogant) in what they were doing to support Emma.  We got home "early" enough to get a full-night's rest.

As I drove home from the hospital, I was reflecting on our evening and became overwhelmed with gratitude for our experience.

God made His Grace tangible for us, throughout our evening.

Now, I don't know why He chose to show His grace in our having a smooth, relatively easy evening with a very positive outcome.  I know there are parents still sitting at their suffering child's bedside, wondering if their child will survive another day.  I can't fathom their pain and anxiety.  But this I know: God is showing His grace even to them.

God lives outside of the construct of time, so He exists in the past, present, and future all at the same time.  To Him, these long nights of suffering are but a blink...less than a moment in the setting of eternity.  He has, ultimately, shown His Grace by providing for our eternity with Him: His Son Jesus.  When our future with Him is settled by our acceptance of that Grace, then everything in this life gets put into a new perspective.

A suffering child is no laughing matter and nothing to glaze over with biblical platitudes.  My understanding of God's supremacy over time, His sovereignty over our history and future, and His great love for us -- understandings recently driven deeper by the ideas CS Lewis writes about in his book -- carried me, with hope and confidence in God, throughout our ordeal.  I ended the evening feeling this verse to be true, even for me, in a very real way...

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